The Cuomo Brothers: ‘Keep Calm And Assault On’

The duo that stands out in 2021 isn’t President Joe Biden and Vice President Kamala Harris, but Chris and Andrew Cuomo. The team of corrupt lewd deviants has led this country to a better place.

Since the #MeToo movement is so far behind Bill Cosby, and he is FINALLY released from prison on his false charges (yeah, right), we can breathe deeper and calm ourselves knowing that the Cuomo brothers are leading the charge against false accusations.

It would be against the “Bro Code” to let your brother be accused of physical assault and not break your journalistic oath to protect him. That’s a given. The fact that Chris didn’t do more to make sure Andrew’s victims felt as uncomfortable as possible is astonishing. Only the likes of Hillary Clinton could top it, but maybe if Chris had reached out to her, she could have given him advice on how to keep these females quiet. “We have to destroy her story,” Chris!

If that wasn’t enough to lose your panties over, Andrew also makes sure that the elderly can enter their grave as fast as possible. Andrew couldn’t resist ensuring that ordinary people were protected from hospitals, so he sent them to nursing homes to make them more comfortable recovering from COVID-19. It all makes sense. It’s more comfortable, and you don’t have to worry about the rude ER nurses and their rushing around. Also, there’s free Jell-O, and there’s no wrongdoing at all, wink-wink.

Best of all, Chris doesn’t even believe that protests have to be peaceful. It doesn’t even say that in the constitution. Chris Guevara could be the key to the socialist utopia we’ve all been waiting for. Where’s Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez at? She needs to put Chris on a t-shirt to up her socialist market value. If we could set them up on a date, then we might get this authoritarian crap hole of a country back on track to free stuff and college for all. AOC’s colleagues wouldn’t have to sleep on the steps of the Capitol building to protest because they would have their way, and not just with the women.

Who needs morals when you could live life as if you’ll never be convicted?